Changed My Life: Journaling

Transcript:

Let me ask you a question.

Why do we, when solving a mathematical problem, begin by writing it down? Why don’t we just solve the problem in our minds?

Mental maths is of course doable, but it’s harder because we have to do two things - remember the problem, and solve the problem. Writing the problem down makes everything easier because now we can just focus on solving it.

In a way, the paper becomes a part of our mind. We’re smarter on paper. Faster. We make fewer mistakes, and mistakes we do make are easier to find and fix. 

So why don’t we do this for problems that aren’t mathematical? Such as life problems, emotional problems, or anything?

Lets rewind a bit. The foundation of almost all society and civilisation involves two skills - reading and writing. Input and output. If you can read, you can learn almost anything. If you can write, you can make almost anything. Each feeds the other - and while reading quite obviously will make you a better writer, writing will make you a better reader.

I say this, because it seems to me that we have a wild imbalance of reading vs writing - of input vs output. We read and consume so so much - and I’m not talking about books, which everyone forever seems to think that they should read more of. I’m talking about the internet. As much as social media is video, pictures and music, text is constant. We are constantly exposed to written ideas, thoughts, feelings. We easily become mentally bloated with them. We rarely have enough time to digest. You don’t need more input. You don’t need more noise. You need quiet. 

I put it to you, that writing - specifically, journaling - is one of the best ways you can find that quiet. When you no longer have to hold the ideas in your mind - you can better think through them, process them, integrate or act upon them, and then let them go.

Lets not forget - reading is pure magic - by looking at some text from a book from thousands of years ago, or some arrangement of symbols on a screen that someone wrote ten minutes ago, I am suddenly transported inside the mind of another. It is telepathy. But while reading is the gateway to the mind of others, journaling is the gateway to your own mind. 

So what is Journaling?

I would define journaling as writing to yourself, for yourself. Your only audience is you. It’s an opportunity, a space, to actually come to understand how you think. How you speak to yourself. What your concerns are and what the solutions might be.  

I started journaling back in 2017, as a way of processing what was going on in my life at the time. Journaling gave me an anchor in an otherwise turbulent sea. A moment of calm, of peace, of clarity. As my inner-city busy job got more hectic, I had a sort of rising level of volume in between my ears as my mind chattered away more and more. I needed to consistently release the pressure, and journaling allowed me to do that. It became an integral part of my life. 

And in the recent months, it’s become ever more useful. Lockdown had different effects on everyone. For me, someone who needs a certain level of output, it meant that more than ever, I had to sit with my thoughts and write about them. 

My journal is an extension of my brain. I can see how I talk to myself, what matters to me, what occupies my headspace - it brings things into focus. It has helped me to more fully know myself, and to be comfortable in my own company. It holds my thoughts and lets me work through them. It’s where I’ve come up with ideas for videos, scripts, sketches. Where I’ve thought about friends and how I’ve felt about them, their troubles and worries. After journaling, I often feel more together, more me. You know the sensation of taking a perfect, deep breath? Journaling gives me that sensation, except it stays with me for much longer.  

Journaling every so often is wonderful on its own, but doing it regularly has allowed me to see my thoughts over time. I’m able to capture small changes I wouldn’t otherwise perceive. So often the hard part about changing is not the first act or the second or third, but rather, remembering to act in the first place. It’s been staggering to me how I’ve been on a three day streak of focusing on some idea or project and on the fourth day I just wake up having completely forgotten about it, only remembering it once I look at my journal. Reading old entries, I can better understand and appreciate the passage of time - I more fully grasp the weight of a week, month or year. And through reading the history of my thoughts, I can better understand who I was then and who I am today. 

There are so many videos and articles on journaling, all telling you that it’ll improve your life, making you more productive, goal-oriented, organised, happier and so on. And, it definitely has done these things for me, but I think focusing on these things misses the point.

If I’ve become more productive, more successful or more focused, it’s a result of simply just getting to know myself better, and learning to be kind to myself. 

It’s changed my life.

Right now, I journal almost every morning, for around 15-20 minutes, sometimes longer, sometimes less. I like having an actual journal as it gives me something to hold, and divides my life neatly into books. Right now, I just use a blank journal with lined paper, but I got started with one using prompts - it was a nice way to ease into it. I like writing by hand because it forces me to slow down - I can type very quickly, but typed text feels so fragile. It can so easily be erased, re-edited, and changed. With writing by hand, I’m slowly making steadfast progress across the paper, word by word. The only way is forwards. There are no mistakes, there are no wrong words, there is only progress. 

Do you need to do it this way? Absolutely not, do it whatever way you like. One of my favourite writers uses a text file, and just types out a full stream of consciousness on a single line. 

You don’t need a fancy journal, or a fancy pen, it doesn’t need to be on paper. You don’t need to do it daily, or weekly, or for a minimum of 5 minutes or 20 minutes or whatever. It doesn’t need to be in the morning or the evening. It’s just writing to yourself. Don’t put it in a bulshit box that shuts you off from doing it. It’s a gift, and it’s yours. There are words only you know and sentences only you can write. Find your words, and what works for you. Do it as often as you like, for as long as you need. 

My suggestion - make a date of it. Casual or formal, whatever takes your fancy. Sit down, find a quiet place, and just write. If you can’t think of anything to write, that’s your first sentence

I can’t think of anything to write. This feels stupid

Once you move past that, and get that out of the way, you’ll start journaling. 

Personally, as a place to start, I generally default to the simple two questions of:

What am I thinking or feeling about? And what is going on in my life?

It’s good to be back. 


Some other notes on the video:

I’m trying to up my cinematography game. Making the physical act of writing look visually interesting isn’t easy, so I had to get a bit crafty with lights, and just try every angle I could. I edited this script over the course of a week as I’m trying to hit more of a genuine-video-essay vibe with this new ‘series’. I have a lot of things I want to talk about, but wanted some conceptual umbrella I could throw them all under. Things that have changed my life sounded clickbaity enough, while also being honest.

Jack LawrenceComment